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<3 my drunken father
Dad : Maybe James can drive us to the dam!
Me : Oh, I saw him at the college the other day.
Dad : Oh how is James?
Me : I didn’t talk to him, I was too busy throwing up in my mouth a little bit.
Dad : If you just made that up, you have to be a writer. Tomorrow when I am going to google “throw up in my mouth a little bit”, and if nohtnig comes up, it’s sealed. You are being a writer.